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Yesterday,

I really struggled through pain to get work done so I didn’t have to do it all today. And so I could do other work today without spending longer at the computer and causing more pain. The last couple of days have just been a struggle.

Oh fuck,

I got a phone call this morning regarding 4son. I was supposed to go to a meeting at school last week regarding his attendance which I cancelled the day before as I had medical appointments. So I’m told off for not cancelling it promptly and for cancelling it by email rather than phone and not to the senior person the meeting was with but with the more junior one who I knew.

Then I get the warning that this is the final meeting at school; after this it goes outside the school’s hands and I face prosecution, criminal record and up to £2,500 fine. All because 4son’s attendance is poor, granted, and there’s nothing wrong with him.

Other students have cancer and have better attendance.

I almost burst into tears. She wasn’t being mean. This is the process and she’s tried talking to 4son before about attendance and it just hasn’t got anywhere. Plus, unlike 3son there’s no medical reason, no evidence so nothing for 4son to use as an excuse other than the fact that he gets tired really easily and struggles with mornings. He had problems getting to primary school on time and would/could fall out of bed half an hour before it started as he could just run down the road. Secondary school is 40 minutes away in normal traffic which doesn’t happen very often and he’s often late as well as frequently just not getting up at all.

I don’t know what the reason is but it’s hard to come down hard on 4son when 2son dropped out of school for 4 years (albeit for reasons beyond his control) and 3son frequently doesn’t go in but he gets away with it because he’s mental and talking to CAMHS. 4son’s only real problem is that he has to live with 3son all year round and 2son occasionally. That’s not a medical condition.

Yes I can beat him up more over bed time and all that but I don’t really think that’s the issue. Maybe we ought to go down the medical route.

He needs to decide to be more resilient.

Don’t we all.

P.S. Today,

I’m also waiting for the expected third housing benefit letter since the last two both arrived on a Friday. So I was really pscyhed to be in a good positive mood and not overly anxious at all. Splendid.

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