For the first time this course I took not a single note for my journal and then left writing it up for too long as it’s certainly easier to write up before memories start to fade.
I was relieved to not be in the first group of presentations that took place today. Covering four topics that form essay number two we each have to give ten minutes on one of them.
The first person was incredibly nervous and spoke very fast but was also well-prepared and well rehearsed. The other three got worse and worse, in terms of content, style and presentation. Nor did they answer the questions. I felt an immediate sense of relief that I couldn’t be the worst presenter in the class. It’s a low bar but I shall jump over it.
What was more challenging was that we had to peer review everybody’s presentation. It was difficult to take notes of what was being said (unnecessary but useful for the accompanying essay), to look at the criteria for the content and the criteria for a presentation. I also felt bad about being critical rather than just focusing on the positive but I did it anyway, even though I felt very mean for so doing. I did share this thought with a peer who felt the same way which did lower my anxiety. Is this about being bullied and feeling at some level that criticism is name calling and belittling? I do appreciate the difference between negative and constructive criticism but still. We all agreed last term to be a bit more critical and that we could all cope.
I spent most of the weekend writing my presentation (and that part of the essay as well) and got stuck for several hours on needing one example and I couldn’t find one or think of one. I decided to be imperfect and leave it there but it’s still niggling at me and I shall have one more go before presenting.
I am confused over the whole point of this exercise that take up the best part of two days. Is it to see if we can deliver a presentation, but what relevance has that? Is it looking at our ability to write peer reviews, but if so the tutor doesn’t look at them. I do not like not seeing what the point is.
I then found my triad very challenging. I like the people I am with but when I observed I wanted to swap places with the listener and intervene myself. [Redacted in the unlikely case one of them reads this] I am projecting my own stuff onto the speaker.
I skipped personal development as I had parents’ evening at school for 4son.